Madhouse Book Club - April 4, 2014 at 703 Bestgate, Annapolis, MD

Proof of Heaven by Eben Alexander

Rise up!  Wordless Brew, Lost Angel, Butterfly Kiss … Our Daily Red … in Horse Heaven Hills with Honest soda  – these are not the prayers of Eben Alexander from Proof of Heaven, but what the Madhouse Book Club drank while discussing Eben’s work … thanks to Robyn’s inspired suggestion and the creative selections of everyone: Robyn, Doug, Ray, Rachel, Melissa, Sue, Jim and Gretchen.

After swimming off the coast of North Carolina with hundreds of dolphins (dolphins evoked the presence of her mom), Melissa cajoled her family a few years ago to stay one more evening so she could hear Eben Alexander talk about heaven at the local high school gym in Kitty Hawk.  Eben’s talk was much richer than the book.  He was easy going, comfortable and genuine in his bowtie and jeans.  Melissa mentioned that Eben is starting to study music. … Jim liked the book, and mentioned Eben’s “Seeking Heaven” audio that draws on the philosophy and impact of sound on experience.

Ray referred to five types of proof (e.g., N = 1; counter example logic; eyewitness) and felt that Eben’s definition of heaven might be problematic for the proper construction of a proof.  Jim noted that one definition could be simply Eben’s experience of heaven.  Melissa mentioned the book “Stroke of Insight” alluding to the brain as the portal to spirituality and sense that we are all one.

Robyn read the book in a back-and-forth manner between the science parts and spirituality parts. Doug felt that in the book science and spirituality were independently presented without sufficient transitions between the two realms.  Jim noted that Eben’s son persuaded Eben to write down his NDEs before researching NDEs, so as not to be influenced by the NDEs of others.  Doug thought that Eben’s realization that the photograph of his deceased biological sister was the girl on the butterfly in his NDE might be confounded by experiences and prior interests in his biological family.  Robyn pointed out that it was clear that Eben saw this photograph after his NDE and that prior to his NDE there was no talk nor knowledge of this sister.

Gretchen thought that the description of NDEs and science were good but ordinary.  Rachel and Doug agreed.  Melissa said that the book was “flat” relative to actually hearing in-person Eben describe his experiences.  Doug felt that more could be done with the music/rhythm connection.  Rachel pointed out that the reptilian brain does not deal with music and rhythm.  Doug will bring in a piece on overtones, reptilian brain, minor key and sadness.  Ray mentioned that heaven is our ability to connect with everyone.

Robyn highlighted the three messages of the book: 1) we are loved and cherished; 2) we have nothing to fear; 3) we can do no wrong (p, 71).  Melissa said that we are wired to survive – the old flight or fight instinct.  Robyn asked “does a baby fear?”

Sue said that babies learn fear, and her comment set the group galloping off in a new and interesting direction.  Rachel talked about family friendly initiatives and “skin-to-skin” actions in hospitals for moms and their newborns.  Sue talked about that initial world of the new born.  Robyn wanted specifics … what can be done for the newborn and young child.

Melissa presented her 3 brain model: 1) intellectual; 2) emotional; 3) reptilian, and described the revolutionary nature of applying this brain model to help folks – a “powerful awareness model”.  The next day Melissa sent this email:  “Here are a few ideas that have come from crazy brains that seldom sleep:)

1. To improve the brain must change

2. The brain changes with emotional experience, NOT with intellectual experience (knowledge or insight)

3. The emotional experience must feel safe and not threatening

4. Trust grows when the safe emotional experience is REPEATED and REVISITED 

Changing brains by growing Trust with Love and not Fear will bridge the illusive gap between knowledge and True Knowing”

Melissa mentions rewiring people for intimacy – where the intellectual and emotional “brains” meet.  Rachel mentioned the “back-to-basics” movement in hospitals and Ray raised the question of introversion.

At this point Doug and Ray took a swig of their Rise Up! Stouts, and Gretchen poured herself a little more Lost Angel wine.  In a moment of confusion Doug mentioned the couplet from Robert Frost that Eben quoted: “We dance around a ring and suppose / But the Secret sits in the middle and knows.”

Jim reflected on the balance of international politics in the Ukraine and the success of health care and minimum wage initiatives at home.  Ray talked about the personality of Putin and geo-cultural boundaries.

Rachel got up and passed out an August 26, 2004 Capital article about her first book club experience, which consisted of books that her mom left on the night stand when she passed away.  These books inspired Rachel to get into cooking and sustains the memory of her mom.

This Mad meeting elicited loving memories, a sense of hope and an intellectual exchange that was passionate and tender.